Clementine

So today is was procrastinating and for some reason i was Googling some old nursery rhymes and songs they made us sing back in primary school, like 10 years ago, and i came across that song 'Clementine'. i don't know if you remember it or if you know it but have you ever actually looked at how crazy the lyrics are?? For a nursery rhyme, it's pretty disturbing! Especially the last 3 versus (not including the chorus)

In a cavern, in a canyon

Excavating for a mine
Lived a miner forty-niner
And his daughter, Clementine

[Chorus]
Oh, my darling, oh, my darling
Oh, my darling Clementine
You are lost and gone forever
Dreadful sorry, Clementine

Light she was and like a fairy
And her shoes were number nine
Herring boxes without topses

Sandals were for Clementine

[Chorus]

Drove her ducklings to the water
Every morning just at nine 

Hit her foot against a splinter
Fell into the foaming brine

[Chorus]

Ruby lips above the water
Blowing bubbles soft and fine
But alas, I was no swimmer
So I lost my Clementine

[Chorus]

Then the miner, forty-niner
Soon began to peak and pine
Thought he oughta join his daughter
Now he's with his Clementine

[Chorus]

There's a churchyard on the hillside
Where the flowers grow and twine
There grow roses, amongst the posies
Fertilized by Clementine

[Chorus]

In my dreams she still doth haunt me
Robed in garlands soaked in brine
Though in life I used to hug her
Now she's dead, I draw the line

[Chorus]

Now you scouts may learn the moral
Of this little tale of mine
Artificial respiration
Would have saved my Clementine

[Chorus]

How I missed her, how I missed her
How I missed my Clementine
Till I kissed her little sister
And forgot my Clementine

[Chorus]
Oh, my darling, oh, my darling
Oh, my darling Clementine
You are lost and gone forever
Dreadful sorry, Clementine

i mean. wtf.

for a child?

wtf.

Soundtracks & Comebacks

I was just thinking, that if they ever made a biography of my life, what songs would I want to be part of the backround music / soundtrack of that film? This is a list of songs I’d want because I think they represent moments / periods of my life, or just remind me of some truly awesome experiences I had:

Champagne Supernova - Oasis

Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen (which i know ALL the words to, thank you very much)

Lost Without You - Robin Thicke 

Could You Be Loved - Bob Marley

Djobi, Djoba - Gypsy Kings

Upside Down - Jack Johnson

Walking On Sunshine - Katrina & The Waves

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun - Cindi Lauper

I Wanna Dance With Somebody - Whitney Houston

Who I Am - Nick Jonas

Summer Nights - John Travolta & Olivia Newton John, ‘Grease’ Sountrack

Home-Wrecker - The Dirty Skirts

Young Folks - Peter, Björn & John

Sun In My Pocket - Locnville

Fader - Temper Trap

Fly Me To The Moon - Frank Sinatra

Summer Wind - Michael Bublé

Dog Days Are Over - Florence & The Machine

Glitter In The Air - Pink

A Beautiful Lie - 30 Seconds To Mars

Yesterday - The Beatles

I Want You To Want Me - Cheap Trick

Iris - Goo Goo Dolls

Love Lost - Temper Trap

Love The Way You Lie - Eminem Ft. Rihanna

Attack - 30 Seconds To Mars

Bring Me To Life - Evanescence

From Yesterday - 30 Seconds To Mars

Maria, Maria - Santana

Mr Brightside - The Killers

Sex On Fire - Kings Of Leon

Paper Planes - M.I.A

Pariahs - Zebra & Giraffe

Rise Above This - Seether

Shock Of The Lightening - Oasis

Somewhere Only We Know - Keane

Sold My Soul - Goldfish

Amor Prohibido -Selena

Love generation - Bob Sinclar

Sunday Morning - Maroon 5

Not Afraid - Eminem

Sweet Disposition - Temper Trap

The Heart Of Life - John Mayer

The Sound Of Silence - Simon & Garfunkel

Hallelujah - Jeff Buckley

Wonderwall - Oasis

Yes, I’d start and end with Oasis :)

Dammit

Can I just say, i really really don't like Taylor Momsen at all.

Or as some of you may know her, Jenny Humphrey from Gossip Girl. Her fashion sense would maybe make her more appealing if it weren't for the fact that my brain is screaming at me "spoiled over-rated brat"! Let's be honest, she really is not the best actress in the world, not by a long shot. The only credible show to her name, Gossip Girl, is a show that's only been around for 3 seasons AND she plays a MINOR character, but yet she has this attitude about her, thinking she's 'famous' and now her shit smells of roses. Oh Please. You are 16 years old. 16!  FFS, Get over yourself.

And really, stop abusing the damn eyeliner. you look like a frikken raccoon.

Having said that, im pretty sure you can imagine how I felt when I heard little miss thang decided to start a band. it probably went something along the lines of "pssht, yeah right, idiotic flop". BUT, and as much as it pains me to say this, her band The Pretty Reckless might actually be kinda cool.

 

And the first single, Make Me Wanna Die aint half bad. It's actually good

*cringe*

Although, I dont understand how the music video (consisting basically of footage of Momsen sitting/standing/walking/looking at herself in the mirror duh) relates to the song in ANY way.

Ok, enough talk,  take a look-see for yourself:

Starbucks

I'm really not much of a coffee drinker and I could probably count on two hands the amount of times I've ever drunk coffee in my entire life. But I'm sure many of you are addicted to this devil's juice, so you should be happy to hear that the head Poncho of coffee is coming to SA. Yup, I'm talking about Starbucks, that money grubbing machine that already had ridiculous amounts of supporters, even people who have never TASTED their products are fans.

I hope that you guys aren't as dumb to think that just because it's Starbucks, it means you'll enjoy it. I personally can't stand the stuff, but hey maybe that's because I'm not big on pumping myself full of caffeine. Go figure.

It's heading to SA just in time for the World Cup, because that's exactly what we need, more out of control people with annoying amounts of energy, at a time where people are already easily excited.

On the bright side, for me at least, it will only be available at select hotels. According to Times Live web page: "Starbucks would be available at Johannesburg's SunSquare Montecasino Hotel and InterContinental Johannesburg Sandton Towers, Southern Sun Cullinan Hotel in Cape Town and Southern Sun Elangeni Hotel in Durban."


So cheers, to that :)

LMFAO

In not normally one for Hip-Hop kind of music, but it seems LMFAO are growing on me,

ever since the theme song for Kourtney & Khloé Kardashian's spin off reality show Kourtney & Khloé Take Miami

which was LMFAO's I'm In Miami Trick (or sometimes I'm In Miami Bitch). You can see what I'm talking about here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1eTrzTfHTw8

I recently watched season 5 of So You Think You Can Dance, and this contestant Mollee Gray

preferred dancing to Hip-Hop music, so she chose to perform a solo to another track of LMFAO called Rock The Beat. I REALLY like this song, and i just wish it were longer, it's like 50 seconds!
Yeah, just check out Mollee performing to the song here, and yes they do censor the 'F' in 'LMFAO' because of what it stands for.

The Vampire Diaries

Chances are,  i won't talk too much about Television shows on my blog, but occasionally, i just HAVE to. Advanced warnings: there will be tons of adjectival writings aimed solely at the hotness that is Damon Salvatore,

played by the gorgeous Ian Somerhalder.  You can follow Ian on Twitter here: http://twitter.com/iansomerhalder

For those of you who are as obsessed with the whole vampire craze as i am, i really hope that you're watching The Vampire Diaries.

Damon Salvatore is single-handedly THE hottest character EVER created. From his piercing blue/green (?) eyes, to that cocky half smile of his, to his bad boy attitude. This added to the fact that he is a vampire, and not the sparkly dependant weak girly kind like someone else we know, but the hardcore, powerful, blood-drinking ruthless hunter that he is, has made him deliciously irresistible to me personally.

When it comes to Damon vs. Stephen, i mean honesty, is that even fair? Ain't NO competition there in my opinion.

Stephen is like broody and dull and just blah, whereas Damon is exciting, naughty, and just oozes sex appeal. The dude is like a a freakin' magnet. Sorry Stephen. And what the hell with Elena?

I mean, sure she's pretty but why is she and Bella (from Twilight) so lame and boring?! Who the hell would pick Stephen! If i were Elena OR Katherine, i still would have gone with Damon. Think about it, who wants to spend eternity with a guy like Stephen when there's a Damon in the picture?

Ok, enough ranting and obsessing, For now, please just enjoy these random pictures of Ian Somerhalder and The Vampire Diaries.
Commence the drooling:

I mean, seriously.

I really dislike Elena. REALLY.

I mean REALLY.

Someone please buy me this. 

Ode to Summer

Goodbye warmth, goodbye Mr Sun
In your sunlight, we had lots of fun
Concerts, picnics, and all in between
In Winter, that's just not our scene.

With a dash of hot chocolate, gloves and layers of clothing
Heavy rains, freezing temperatures, Lubs and Preshina moaning
These are the perfect ingredients that I will want more
Laying in bed spending endless nights inside, thats my law.

Summer summer, now you've gone away
And the cold Winter nights are here to stay
I thank you kindly for all that you've done
Days spent outside, lounging in the sun
December '09 will always be great
But now its 2010, and the World Cup do we await

Thank you for the special moments,
I know they are few
So long
Farewell
And i bid you,
Adieu.

Cooler As Ekke

So thanks to the song Cooler As Ekke, I am officially a fan of Cape Townian white Afrikaans rapper Jack Parow

Check him out on MySpace or on his Twitter.

Whatever you're doing. Stop. Just watch this video:

Original Afrikaans lyrics:

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ekke, want jy rook Yves Saint Laurent sigarette

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ekke, want jy’t ‘n tattoo van ‘n slang op jou tette.

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ek, want jy’t ‘n plakkaat van Led Zeppelin bo jou bed

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ek, want jy’s elke jaar by die J&B Met.

Jy’s ou nuus, ek kom met rou beats

Jy lê en wag, ek gan soek iets

Jy’s ice tea, ek’s witblits

Jy’s lite bier, ek’s spirits

Jy’s die ou met die new fresh look

Ek’s die ou met die Pep Stores broek

Ek watch jou, jy koekeloer oukes

Jy forward nog Vernon Koekemoer jokes

Ek’s fantasties, jy’s spasties

Ek vat an poppies, jy raak an klein kids

Jy’s Tim Voster, ek’s Chris Edwards

Jy’s innie bosse, ek rol innie vet shit

Jy’s boring soos liedjies ommie kampvuur

My styl slick sneak suutjies soos ‘n vampire

Jou styl kak sag soos ‘n pink marshmallow

Meisies skree vir net “one night in parow”

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ekke, want jy hang saam met models en ek hang saam met slette

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ekke, want ek’s ‘n rapper en jy sing in falsetto

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ek, want ek ry op met die bus en jy vlieg op met ‘n jet

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ek, want jy ry in ‘n Peugeot twee nul ses

Jy rol met ‘n selfoon in jou pen

Ek rol nog met ‘n 3310

My styl gooi sexy korrek

Jy dra nog fokken Mr Price Red

As ek instap skrikkie hele fokken bar

Jy kry nog fokken geld by jou ma

Ek los die hele jol papnat

As jy instap begin die hele jollie pad vat

Ek’s Amerika, jys Irak

Ek bomb jou lat die kak slap spat

Ek’s ‘n Bic pen, jy’s ‘n Mont Blanc

Jy loop rond met fokken skuim op jou mond-rand

Ek’s original jy’s gecopy

Ek’s ‘n flash drive jy’s ‘n floppy

Jy maak of jy alles het ma jy’s fake

Jack Parow bra ek lewe soos n straatmeit

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ekke, want jy drink by Ku De Ta en ek drink by De Dekke

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ekke, want jy’s die gentleman, bra eksie prette

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ek, want ek hou vakansie in Hartenbos en jy hou vakansie in Quebec.

Jy dink jy’s cooler as ek, omdat jy die nuwe issue van One Small Seed het.

Jack Parow bra ek’s n poes woes

Jy eet caviar en couscous

Ek drink Klipdrif, jy drink Peroni

Jy’t vriende in Swede, ek het vriende in Benoni

Ek koop al my klere by die local Pep Stores save more

Jy koop al jou fokken klere by a store

Jy dra net fokken Polo shirts

Shame, jy luister na die Dirty Skirts

My naam’s Parow, dik heavy uitgeskollie

Jy lyk soos Jeremy de Tollie

Jack Parow, die life van die party

Jy dra net fokken Issey Miyake

Jy’s too cool for school, eks mos kief

Ek’s grasshopper, jys Lacoste sportief

Jy lat die koek flop, ek lat die huis rys

Jou meisie het ‘n foto van my piel op haar Space Case

English Translation WITH slang Afrikaans words in Bold, but English equivalent in brackets ():

Jack Parow

Cooler Than Ekke (I) 

You think you're cooler than Ekke (means 'I', so like 'me') because you smoke Yves

Saint Laurent cigarettes.

You think you're cooler than Ekke (me) because you've got a tattoo of a snake on your tette (boobs).

You think you're cooler than me because you've got a poster of Led Zeppelin above your bed.

You think you're cooler than me because you're at the J&B Met each year (A South African horse-racing event where people wear crazy outfits).

You're old news, I come with raw beats

You lie and wait, I go searching for something

You're ice tea; I'm witblits (colourless spirit / alcohol)

You're light beer, I'm spirits

You're the old with the new fresh look

I'm the guy with the Pep Stores pants (generally considered to be a store of cheap pricing and quality)

I watch you, you koekeloer (I’m not sure about this word) oukes (people, friends)

You still forward Vernon Koekemoer jokes (random dude spotted at random places. Was a pop culture thing in SA for a bit:)

I'm great, you're spasties (spastic/ spaz)

I take poppies(?), you go on about small kids (?)

You're Tim Vorster , I'm Chris Edwards (they're both stars on an SA soapie, Egoli)

You're innie (in the) bushes, I roll innie (in the) fat shit

You're boring as campfire songs ommie (?)

My slick style sneaks quietly like a vampire, your style is soft shit like a pink marshmallow

Girls screaming for just "one night in Parow" (Parow is both a place in SA and the singer's surname, reference to One Night in Paris [Hilton])

You think you're cooler than Ekke (me), because you hang with models and I hang together with slette (sluts)

You think you're cooler than Ekke (me) because I'm a rapper and you sing falsette (falsetto - higher voice register)

You think you're cooler than me because I travel on the bus and you fly with a jet

You think you're cooler than me because you drive a Peugeot two six zero

You roll with a cellphone in your pen (pants)

I still roll with a 3310 (OLD Nokia phone)

My style goes sexy correctly
You still wear fucking Mr Price Red (SA clothing store/ brand of cheaper costs)

If I walk in, skrikkie the whole fucking bar (the whole bar gets frightened)

You still get fucking money from your mother

I leave the whole jol (party) papnat (wet / dripping wet)

If you enter, the whole party pad vat (take the road = they all leave)

I'm America, you are Iraq

I bomb you, I make the splash

I'm a Bic pen,

You're a Mont Blanc

You walk around with foam on the edge of your fucking mouth

I'm a flash drive you're a floppy (floppy disk)

You act as if you have everything, but you're fake

Jack Parow bra (man) I live like a straatmeit (a street mate / friend = a vagrant)

You think you're cooler than Ekke (me) because you drink at Ku De Ta and I drink at De Decks (Cape Town clubs)

You think you're cooler than Ekke (me), because you are the gentleman, bra (man) eksie (I’m the) prette (picture [of a gentleman])

You think you're cooler than me because I holiday in Hartenbos (place near Cape Town)

And you holiday in Quebec (in Canada, duh).

You think you're cooler than me because you have the new issue of One Small Seed (SA pop culture magazine)

Jack Parow bra (man) I'm a poes woes (wild cat)

You eat Caviar and couscous, I drink Klipdrif (Klipdrift, SA brandy),

You drink Peroni (Italian beer? i think. I don’t drink)

You have friends in Sweden, I have friends in Benoni (Place in SA. See link; also where SA actress & model Charlize Theron is from)

I buy all my clothes at the local Pep Stores, save more

You buy all your fucking clothes at a store

You only wear fucking Polo Shirts

Shame, you listen to The Dirty Skirts (local Cape Town band)

My name's Parow, thick, heavy uitgeskollie (skollie = naughty boy)

You look like Jeremy de Tollie (The Dirty Skirts frontman)

Jack Parow the life of the party

You only wear fucking ISSEY MIYAKE (I'm assuming he means the perfume)

You're too cool for school, eks mos kief (i'm, of course, cool)

I'm Grasshopper (a shoe brand),

You are Lacoste sports

You let the cake flop, I raise the house

Your girl has a picture of my dick on her Space Case (pencil box)

The end.
Well that's it kids. Hope you enjoy.

And for the record, I like The Dirty Skirts.